Today I had my Needs Assessment for support with uni stuff. I have never had it during undergrad; always been too shy, too ashamed, too convinced I wasn’t actually worth any help or didn’t deserve it. I would fail modules before I even asked for an extension. The one time I got courage to ask for help, the woman at the Advice Place said if it was “just depression” I might not get anything. I didn’t want anything but support.
So being at UKC has been an eye-opener. They are very supportive and are trying to set up mentoring. The woman I spoke to was very kind and helpful, and they have offered me things I didn’t know existed, provided I get funding. Audiobook software is the main amazing thing- I have lately found myself unable to concentrate more than three pages, of which I will have generally comprehended one and a half. For a literature student that feels so, so, so awful. But maybe Audio would help.
A lot of the assessment brought up things that make me sad, or ashamed, or dissatisfied, about my (failure to) study. But at the same time it’s a chance, a rope-bridge to a future.
Rope-bridges are shaky as feck, but they’re still a route across.