“But I don’t have any of the symptoms of EUPD except the self-harm.”
“So what is the self-harm about, do you think?”
It’s something I have lived with for a long time. It’s a parasite the sizes of my shadow: sometimes small and unthreatening, sometimes too huge to avoid. Like a shadow, I can hold it beneath my feet and sometimes that is enough to control it. But whatever I do, I can’t rid myself of it, I can’t peel it from my soles, I can’t lose it. It’s still there beneath my toes, wishing that it could be freed from under them, the way I wish I could be unstuck from above it.
But like a shadow, I don’t know what life would be like without it.